How to Contact a Guy on Match.com
So, you have browsed a dating site and found a few ‘potential matches’ that look good on paper so far. Now you need to get in contact with them.
One of the easiest ways to get a guy notice you is to view his profile and hope that he will see you in his ‘who’s viewed me’ queue. If he checks who’s viewed him and sees your profile, he may just e-mail you on the spot especially if you have a great profile and flattering pictures.
But what if he doesn’t check who’s been looking at him? In this case, you may want to go to the next step and add him to your favorites. Most likely he will see that you’ve added him to your favorites and this will give him a green light to contact you.
If he still hasn’t looked at your profile, or has looked at your profile but has not initiated contact, wait for a couple of days. Give him some time. He may have not checked your profile yet, or has checked it but has not gotten around to writing to you.
If after a couple of days you notice that he still has not looked at your profile, you may then send him a wink (almost sure-fire way to get him to look at your profile), or even send him an e-mail.
Note that if he has looked at your profile and has not initiated contact in any form, this most likely means that he never will. At this point it is clear that he is not interested, and I suggest moving onto the next one. No need to spend time trying to entice a guy who is fence-sitting or is not interested, especially since there is no shortage of men on a dating site.
But if it turns out that he is so busy that he doesn’t have the time to check who’s adding him to favorites, you may want to initiate contact yourself.
E-mail is a preferred method of contact. Everyone likes to get something more personal than a wink. Guys and women alike want to feel special, and sending an e-mail shows that you’ve taken the time to actually write a couple of paragraphs.
When you contact a man remember to address something in his profile. You want him to see you as someone different and you want to show a little bit of personality.
Don’t say ‘I like your smile’ because everyone says that, and this is not original. You also don’t want to describe yourself and what you like in your e-mail; this is what your profile is for.
When you write to a guy you want to specifically address something in his profile, but something that is unique in his profile, not something that everyone else is addressing. Everyone likes pretty much the same things, but you want to find something in his profile that makes him stand out, something that makes him different from everyone else, and address that particular part of his profile.
You may also want to say something about his pictures. Obviously if you are contacting him, that means that you like his pictures. Again, don’t say, ‘you have beautiful eyes’, or ‘you have a cute smile’ because these are the things everyone else is saying. Find something unique. Again, you will stand out from the crowd almost immediately.
Don’t write your whole life story in the first e-mail. You don’t need this at this point; when you get to know each other better and in person, you will be sharing a lot about each other, but telling your whole life story in an e-mail to a perfect stranger is wasted time. At this point all you want to do is gauge whether there is any interest to begin with.
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