Why You Should Make Him Trust You
When you saw the title of this article, you probably said to yourself, duh, of course, I know that my man needs to trust me; and I don’t see a reason for him to not trust me; I have given him no reason to not trust me.
But wait, TRUST that I am talking about here is not trust that you have when you know someone is not going to cheat on you or steal from you. I am talking about trust in knowing that your man can open up to you and show you his ugliest side and knowing that you will not turn your back on him.
This kind of trust is hard to earn, and it comes with time. This is why you and your man need to spend a lot of time together, share thoughts, conversations and activities, and see each other in situations ranging from extreme, uncomfortable, difficult, stressful and challenging, as well as situations that are tempting.
Here is an example;
Once upon a time I went on a road trip with a good friend (platonic friend) whom I had known for a couple of years. I thought I knew him very well.
As we drove on the freeway in my car, suddenly steam started to come from under the hood. We got off the freeway barely making it and ended up stranded in the middle of nowhere in the dark. It wasn’t very late in the evening, but it was already dark. There wasn’t a gas station around, and nowhere to look for help.
We opened the hood and determined that the steam was coming from the radiator. The engine was overheating as there wasn’t any water left in the radiator.
It was December and it was very cold. We were stranded in the middle of nowhere.
Luckily I had a whole case of bottled water in the trunk. It came in handy. We started opening bottles of water and pouring it into the radiator. I was anxious and apprehensive.
My friend seemed to be feeling the same.
Instead of reassuring me and giving me confidence in knowing that he was going to handle it (like we’d expect a man), he was just as nervous as I was and seemed to have lost it.
As the engine cooled off a bit he got behind the wheel and told me he was going to drive back on the freeway so that we could make it to the nearest gas station where we could get more water, re-group, and decide what to do from there.
It made me very nervous to get back on the freeway but we made it. The next exit had a gas station right by the freeway. We pulled up to the gas station at the time when the worker’s shift was ending. They closed the doors to count the money and told us that we could leave my car key at their shop for the morning staff to take a look at my car (there was a repair shop right on the property).
Finally we got a friend to come pick us up, and the car was checked and fixed the following day.
But after that experience with my friend I thought to myself that the whole time up until the incident happened I didn’t know what kind of a guy he really was. My experience with him under extreme circumstances showed me that he wasn’t the kind of guy I would ever want to be with on a romantic level even if I was interested in him romantically (which I was not).
So, when I talk about developing trust with your man I refer to the kind of trust in knowing that you will have his back and he will have yours.
As a woman you are not expected to be the stronger party. He should be the one.
Nevertheless, your man, likewise should have trust in knowing that no matter what you will have his back too. He needs to know that in a difficult and challenging situation you won’t run away and drop him like a hot potato to seek greener pastures.
He should be able to relax around you knowing that you have his best interest at heart.
So, how do you show him this other than by artificially manufacturing a stressful situation?
You can communicate with him in a special way. Don’t worry, you won’t have to tell him that he can trust you. Rather, you can implant the idea into his mind when you know how to communicate with men in a way that makes them feel bonded with you.
There is a way to make your man trust you, and make him feel unstoppable surges of love toward you.